Friday, December 7, 2012

Explanation.



HELLO!!
Thank you all for ur amazing feedback here and on twitter I really appreciate it! And for all of who asked..
YES it’s a true story.
 I only made up what was said in the voice notes, what was said between them as conversations and I changed the names of the characters of course!!

What was said on the day that Zaina died in IS TRUE, ITS WHAT SHE SAID AND WHAT FARIS REPLIED.

Faris lost Zaina two years ago, Faris refused to move to a new house, He still looks at her window every time he leaves the house, He doesn’t admit it to everyone but he still listens to Zaina voice notes when he misses her, he still smiles to himself when he thinks of her, He breaks down every once in a while but the love around him from his family and friends is lifting him up.

Zaina passed away and all what Faris has left is the voice notes, pictures and captures, nothing else.

I took his persimmon  to write the story, He knows that I'll post the story but he doesn’t know where!

The whole point of me writing the story is not so you would feel sorry for Faris, It's because you need to focus on the little things in life, You should give your loved ones the attention that they need, life is too short and we need to live it happily and be good to one another, go tell the people that you love that you care about them and that you appreciate having them in your life, they need to hear that every once in a while..    

*Last point..
If you got any comments for him, any supporting and positive words I'll make sure that he reads them,  If you got any questions you may ask, I hope that none of you start posting random names or predicting who my characters are…those comments will be deleted!
Thank you all so much.  

Because your heart is my home..LAST PART.

Hello!!!

1. This is the last part of the story.

2. I didn't write what most of you wanted me to write, You'll figure out the reason at the end of the post.

3. After reading this part I'm sure that you'll have some questions to ask! I'll post an explanation and I'll answer all of your questions!

ENJOY IT!

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Faris opened his eyes…he looked around, he found himself in the living room downstairs, his mother was on the couch in front of him..

"Faris... 9aba7 elkhair 7abebe"

Maybe it was just a bad dream and he just woke up? Maybe Zaina is still alive.

Faris looked around for his mobile

Faris: yuma wain telephoney?

Mother: ga3da ash7ina lik

Faris looked around, he saw his mobile grabbed it and walked outside..

Mother: FARIS WAIN RAYI7?!!!!

He opened whatsapp, clicked on Zaina's chat

Zayoon
Out!

He looked up at her window, Just like he does every morning.. like he does every time he leaves the house, Faris was expecting to see her.. to see her beautiful face, bright smile wishing him a good morning.

Zayooon!!!!!!

Faris kept looking at her window, he knew that he won't see her face today.. not anymore.

He looked for her car in their house parking.. it wasn’t there.

Zaina was gone..the love of his life, his best friend, the rock that he always leaned on.. she was gone.

"Zainaa" Faris whispered to himself..it was too late, she won't hear him, not now.. not anymore.

Faris turned around and saw his mother standing, her eyes were filled with tears, she couldn’t stand seeing her son in that state.

"Kint na6rha itakharaj.. kint na6irha t9er murti"

Faris threw himself in his mother's arms and cried, He cried for losing Zaina, He cried for losing himself with her, He cried because she died while being disappointed of him, he cried because he can't fix anything.. he was completely helpless. 
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He looked at his white dishdasha..at his pale face, and red eyes.

Zaina was gone and he should man up and move on, that what was his brother trying to convince him to do.

"Faros tikfa la tabche bil magbara!!! Shbegolon ahalha!! Mo kilhom yadron!"
Faris said nothing, he just stared at his brother.

"Faris!!!"

"SHLON MA ABCHE? TADRE INE KIL YOUM RA7 A6LA3 MIN EL BAIT O MA ALGA SAYART'HA 9AF6A? MA RA7 ALGAHA T6IL 3ALAY? MA RA7 TDIG 3ALAY TIT7AL6AAM 3ALA AGHBA EL ASHYA2 BAS MA T9ADIG WANASTE!!  SHLON MA ABCHE O ZAINA MA RA7 TKON MAWJODA 7OOLE? MA RA7 ASHOFHA WALA ASMA3 7IS'HA? SHLON?"

Faris left Ahmed standing and walked to the car, he looked at Zaina's window for one last time, took a deep breath and got in the car.
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Faris watched them carry Zaina's body.. dead body.. She was covered in white…

He just walked behind the huge number of men..tears started forming in his eyes…He wanted all of this to be over, he wanted this to be a nightmare and he just needs to wake up from it.

They started putting her in her grave, He couldn’t feel his legs anymore he leaned on his brother and closed his eyes, Faris felt like screaming at them.. telling them to let her go..but he didn’t..he couldn’t, Zaina is dead and he had to accept that fact..

"Allah yr7amha..3atham allah ajrkom…3athamm allah ajirkom.. allah yir7amha.."
Was the most said words that day..

"Ahmed mita ib namshe?" Faris whispered in Ahmed's ears.

Faris couldn’t stand up anymore, He couldn’t breathe he just wanted to leave.

Ahmed looked at his brothers pale face: yalla al7een namshe!! Bas khansalim 3ala-

Faris: ana ban6rik bl sayara

Faris walked to the car with heavy steps…all he could think about was Zaina..her smile, her funny laugh, the way she made his day just by being in it.. .what would he do without her? How would his days be?

He felt the tears roll down his cheeks, he closed his eyes..it hurts, he covered his face with his ghetra leaned on a car and cried..He lost Zaina, His Zaina, he won't ever see her, He never imagined a day without her and he's going to have to live his whole life without her.

"FARIS!!! GOOOM!! 9al 3al nibi allah yhadeek!!!"

His brother helped him stand and they walked to the car together.

They got in the car, Ahmed directed the ac to Faris, Faris took off his ghetra, He opened their Whatsapp chat and read the last sentence that she told him..

"someday you'll need me and you won't find me."

He felt choked up, Faris couldn’t breathe, he unbuttoned the upper buttons of his dishdasha and took a deep breath.

Faris went through their pictures, his favorite was a picture that was divide into two parts, them when they were kids and when they grew up, they were wearing the same colors, Faris eyes were crossed and Zaina was laughing at him.. in both pictures.. Faris smiled..

But the smile faded when he realized that she was gone.. He won't act silly around her.. and he won't hear her laugh anymore.
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They reached home, Faris didn’t even dare to look at her window.. not today..not now..

He walked to his room, threw himself on bed and started listening to some voice notes that she sent.

YAAA 9ABAA7 ELZAAAIN WEL ZAINAAAH!!! ANA BIL JAM3A! *sigh* laish kint a9arkh? 7ada enjaz ine bil jam3a!! Zoorna w3zimne 3ala Starbucks! Yalla rise and shine! Hmm o bas ma 3indi salfa! Take care!!!

Faris moved to the next one..
EL LAILAA GHAAIR EL LIYAAALE WALAAA!! O TARN TARAN EL LIYALE WALA!! *laugh* nisait el ghniya!!! Bas elmohim fahamt qasdi!! Happy birthday yal shayiiib!!!

Faris remembered that voice note very well, it was Faris's first birthday without her, she was in London, but he woke up the next day and found a birthday cake and a gift from Zaina..she planned it before she left..

He clicked on the next voice note..
YA3NI SHNO MA TGDAR TRID! FAROOOOOS!! ANA AHAM MIN ELCLASS!! *giggle*ok el class aham! ELMOHIM dictore gale drop my class la2anch an F student! *laugh* JARA7 MASHA3RE!! adri ene F student bas mo lazm ygole ya3ni *giggle* elmohim! Mita  bashofik ya kamil wi9ofik? el yoom omahatna eb y6l3on ytaghadon!! Btye!! Ashoofik at 3!! Take care!!

Faris smiled at each laugh, all he had left is her voice notes, pictures and captures, nothing else..

Zaina won't call him each morning, she won't send him any voice note..

Zaina won't help him with his assignments, He won't hear "FARIS law trakiz tgdar tkhalis eb rubi3 sa3a bas malik khilg elderasa!!"

Faris won't call her whenever he misses her, Zaina won't call him and tell him about her day..

Faris won't tell Zaina "out" every time he leaves the house so she would look out the window and gave him a wide smile, or a funny face and wishes him a good day!

"Malich shghil ba7ad el mohim ana 3indch" "YAAAL THEQA!!" Faris will miss hearing that every time Zaina told him about an argument she had with anyone.

"Deerbalik bl 6reej!! Faris rabi6 7zamik? Don’t text and drive!! BAS basida!! Laish lal7en ga3id tkalmne? BYE FARIS" He'll miss Zaina telling him that every time he calls her while he's driving.

Faris closed his eyes while hearing Zaina's voice, he knew that his life will be different from now on.. He won't have Zaina in it and he has to figure out a way to accept it and live with it.
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  *Two years passed on Zaina's death, Faris still looks at Zaina's window every time he leaves the house, he still wishes that she would look out and wave at him with a wide smile on her face.. 

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Because your heart is my home.. (3)

Hi!!!!

1. How are you guys?

2. The last post will be posted on Saturday! OR I may post it tomorrow if I got lots of feedback... ee ee 6ama3a :p

3. I'll announce a surprise related to the story in the last part, but I'll tell you the details the day after!

Enjoy it :D

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Faris was sitting between his friends, he took his mobile out of his pocket, he found two Whatsapp messages from Zaina.

OFF NISAIT ADIG 3ALA ZAINA!!!

Etha u can't call me just tell me that you won't la tgol I'll call you o atim an6ir!!! This is not the first time that this happens!

Faris I'm fed up with this! I just need you to be here for me, You know? someday you'll need me and you won't find me.

Faris walked out of the shalaih: la la la tiz3al 3alay!!!

He called Zaina, her mobile was switched off: mo 3awayidha!

Faris got a bit worried: shfene ga3id a7ate? Akeed khala9 elsha7an!

Faris turned around and found Ahmed his brother standing.

Faris: a7mido shfek?

Ahmed: Faris lazm n7adr al7een

Faris's heartfelt heavy, he didn’t like Ahmed's face expression, he knew that something is wrong.

Faris: laish?

Ahmed: enta imsh bas o ba3dain agolik!

Faris: Ahmed mani mit7arik mn mukane ila lama a3arf laish!!!

Ahmed: irkab wiyay elsayara wagolik

Faris felt choked up, something was wrong, Zaina was the only person that he could think of after his parents and siblings.

Faris: omi aw oboy fehom shay?

Ahmed: la el7imdallah

Fairs: ikhwane?

Ahmed: la

Faris's breathing started to get heaver by the second: Ahmed-

Ahmed: Faris emsh elsayara

Faris: Ahmed mo zayon tikfa mo zayoon!!!

Ahmed: Fariss!!! emsh elsayara

Faris: wain mifta7 sayarti?

Ahmed: bn7adir eb sayarti

Faris: Ahmed tikfa

Ahmed: erkab elsayara wagolik!

Faris got in the car, He opened the ac and directed it to him, it was hard to breathe.

Ahmed drove off.

Faris: Ahmed ta7acha

Ahmed: Faris.. tadre kel shay y9er bil dinya lah 7ikma o-

Fairs: AHMED!!!!

Ahmed: Zaina sawat 7adeth qawe wehya rada min bait yadha..

Faris couldn’t breathe, Zaina? His zaina?

Faris: shkithir qawe el7adeth?

Ahmed: enqaloha elmistashfa o ahalha 3endaha

Faris: Ahmed… shkithir qawe el7adith

Ahmed: madri Faris madri!!!

Faris kept staring at his chat with Zaina, he felt tears form in his eyes, if she dies he wouldn’t bare a second without her. If she dies she'd die while she's disappointed of him.

Ahmed's phone rang, Faris looked at him: Mno?

Ahmed: oboy

Faris: 3a6ne!!

Ahmed picked it up: hala yuba..ee ma3ay.. la ana ele ga3id asoug..enshallah enshallah..

Faris: shgaal?

Ahmed: mako yis2al wain wi9alna o gal shway shway derbalkom!!

Faris: Ahmed mani gader atnafas.. mako hawa

Ahmed: Faris mako ela el3afya basic m7atat

The two of them remained silent..until..

Faris: ahmed hatha 6reej baitna!!!

Ahmed: ee

Faris: wadne elmistashfa!!! Ahmed!!!

Ahmed: Faris oboy gal tridon el bait

Faris: TISTA3IB6?!! AHMED BAROU7 ASHOFHA!!! AY BAIT AL7EEEN? WAGTA?!!

Ahmed parked the car in front of their house, Faris got out and walked to the driver seat.

Ahmed: shtabe?

Faris: 3a6ne elmiftaa7 baro7laha!!!

Ahmed: Faris 9al 3al nibi o dish elbait

Faris: AHMED INTA OKHOY EL3OOD LA TKHALENE ARFA3 9OUTIII 3ALAAAIK!!!

"Faris"

Faris turned to his left and found his father standing.

Faris knew that something is wrong with Zaina, something is bigger than just an accident.

Faris: yuba tikfa.. barou7 3a6one mifta7 ay sayara.. tikfa yuba-

Faris saw tears in his father's eyes…he knew it.. he knew it… he just didn’t want to think that it might’ve happened.

Faris: yuba… Zayon maa-?

His father nodded.

Faris pointed at Zaina's window: ..la yuba ila Zayon

Faris's couldn’t keep on standing, he was too weak..

Faris: yuba… Ahmed!! Tikfon a7ad yan6ig!! Ygol shay!!!

Father: Faris.. zaina tiwafat gabil sa3a..

Faris closed his eyes and all what he saw was black, and he knew that that would be his life after Zaina…

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Because your heart is my home.. (2)

Hi

1. How is everyone doing?

2. I'll remind you guys, this story is made of 4 posts only, the next post will be posted on Thursday enshallah ;)

3. I'd love to read ur feedback!

ENJOY IT!

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-Thursday-

"Btro7 elshalaih?"

Faris: Ee!! Shbega3idne bl deera ib weekend!

Zaina sighed, she hated it when Faris went to the chalet, it takes him away from her, He doesn’t talk to her a lot when he's there, he rarely replies to her texts and if he does it takes him up to 50 minutes to write a reply of one or two words.

Zaina: khosh

Faris: shfech?

Faris felt the disappointment in her voice but he can't help it!

Zaina: mafene shay

Faris: Zaina wala mo bede!!

Zaina: adre Faris.. dayman mo bedik

Faris: Zaina..

Zaina: 3ade Faris!! Ag9aah weekend o btrid tifthale 9a7?

Faris: 9a7!!

Zaina smiled with a heavy heart: have fun!

Faris: out

Zaina smiled and rushed to her window, and there he was standing with his shalaih bag, smiling at her, his smile made her happy... he made her happy.

Faris: za3lana 3alay?

Zaina sighed and nodded.

Faris: Zayoooon! Wala ba7awil afthalich!! o ba7awil arid 3alaich!

Zaina give him half a smile.

Faris: yaaah!! Sh'hal ebtisama? Zaina!! Ebtasmay!!

Zaina smiled.

Faris: ibtasmay 3adil bashouf throusich!!

Zaina giggled, smiled and crossed her eyes: CHITHI ZAAAIN?

Faris laughed, he really wanted to tell her that he loves her.. something inside him was telling him to say it..

Faris: Zaina?

Zaina: hala?

Faris went quiet for a couple of minutes: ummm ashofch elsabt!

Zaina smiled: enshallah, deerbalik bl 6reeej!!

Faris: 7athir mama Zaina

Zaina giggled and waved at him: bye Faris

Faris waved back: bye Zaina

Zaina kept watching him until his car left their street..
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Faris reached the shalaih and he was busy just like he is every time he sets a foot in Bnaider.
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Zaina checked her mobile, she sent him a text 40 minutes ago, still no reply, she was really sleepy.

Goodnight Faris..

She put her mobile on the charger and went to sleep.
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-Friday-

Zaina opened her eyes, stretched her hands to her mobile.

Two missed calls from Faris.
Zaina nimtay? sorry wala tawne aftha!!!
Shaklich nimtay, Goodnight zayoon ;)  

Zaina sighed efff Faris sh3ugba?
Good morning Faris

Zaina stayed in bed, it was Friday and she was allowed to be lazy.

She decided to leave bed an hour before their family gathering starts!

- Half an hour-

"ZAYOONA YALLA GOMAY BADLAY 3ASHAN NRO7 BAIT YADICH!"

Zaina: OKAAAY!!!

Zaina checked whatsapp.
Good morning zayouuuun!!! Ba6ib ba7ar I may not reply, enjoy the family gathering!!   

Zaina: you may not reply? La 3ad 7adek ur replying 3ashan tafrig wiyay!

Zaina sighed.

Faris!!! Deerbalik!  

Zaina always worried about Faris when he's in bnadier, she hated all water sports that he enjoyed doing.

Dont worry!!

She smiled, put her mobile on the table and left her bed.
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Faris looked at her reply, Zaina was disappointed of him, she wasn’t herself, she's usually hyper he could feel it through the texts!! He could see her smiles, but he wasn’t there, he wasn’t around her for a whole day yesterday and he felt guilty.
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Zaina spent her afternoon with her family, she missed Faris, she really did…she walked out to the garden and dialed his number.

It rang..
Rang..
And rang..
He didn’t reply.

Faris I miss you.

Zaina sat on a bench in the garden, hoping that he'd see the missed call and call her back..

She waited for 15 minutes.
Zayon :(  ana bl sayara weya rab3e I can't pick up!!

Zaina sighed.
I'll call you awal ma o9al elshalaih!!!

Zaina walked inside.
Faris, I'm sick of this, I'm sick of you being so away.

Faris was so busy with his friends.
Zaina, bare with it!! Bas 3 days in a week!!!

Zaina sighed.
Take care.

Faris really felt guilty, she really didn’t deserve this!! She deserved a lot more attention from him.
I'll call you awal ma o9al elshalaih!
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-Two hours passed-

Zaina picked her purse and walked to the door: yalla ya jima3a ma3a elsalama!!

Zaina called Faris while walking to her car... he didnt pick up.

Lal7en ma wi9alt elshalaih? Faris I'm having a LONG day I want to tell you about it and I really miss you!!! Please :(  
She got in her car and drove off to starbucks, she picked up her drink, checked her mobile..nothing from Faris.

She called him one last time.. he didn’t pick up, She texted him again.

Zaina felt like crying, she closed her eyes tight, she just needed him.. she needed to talk to him but he's not there for her.

Zaina put her mobile in her purse and drove off…